In regard to domestic violence I am pleased to say that the Chinese people are not as bad as I feared they would be. Mao Tse Tung said ‘Women hold up half the sky’ and that has become a reminder to men here that women deserve respect, however, a friend tells me that in the new capitalist China women have less power than they used to have when she was a child in the Cultural Revolution era (a horrible time in other ways). I note that bosses are almost always men. However, I have heard nothing of violence within relationships and if it were common in the cities I have lived in I believe I would have heard whispers.
There is a lot of violence in China and I have seen and heard of it in each of the cities I have lived in here. However there is a strong tradition of love of family and perhaps that reduces the incident of violence between marriage partners. Sadly, in many families children are often physically punished for failure in school. Chinese women are certainly not anything like the stereotypes in western minds. I often see girls and boys, young men and women, on the street having play punching sessions and the girls are often putting a good effort into it. I’ve seen Chinese girls chasing boys around the classroom in fairly serious ways. In contrast is is not uncommon to see a girl crouching and crying on the street with a concerned boyfriend trying to appease her. It must be complex to be a young Chinese living such contrasts.
I can’t say that Western countries have made much progress in reducing Domestic Violence. Thank God we have Women’s Shelters. We men have the physical strength but not the emotional strength. Too often men ‘lose it’ and beat their wives or use the greater economic power they often have to harm women in other ways. I was a welfare worker and counsellor over 15 years and couldn’t believe the situations I had to help in. Eventually I couldn’t carry it any more and looked for other ways to make a living. If you are a man concerned about this behaviour and you want to know more, call your local women’s support group and ask for more information. They should welcome your interest, but if they seem a little hard line and suspicious it’s just because they have seen and experienced so much that they can feel anger against men in general.
One of my intentions in blogging is to reflect on my own experiences and observations and what I said matches what I have seen in China. However, there is a lot of violence in the Chinese people, who are obsessed with Kung fu and see Tai Chi as a martial art. The beautifully choreographed movements are, in fact, a defensive movement system that can easily be transferred to an offensive mode. I sense a great air of tension in Wuhan, the city I live in, and a friend who gets out and about more than I do seems lately to be constantly coming across acts of violence as she rides her bicycle to and from work. I really should not conclude that just because none of that has been against a woman it doesn’t happen. If someone can be standing slapping an old man in public with no one trying to intervene it seems likely that the individual doing the slapping would fit the profile of a person who would be violent to women too. Chinese people are even less likely than urban Westerners to get involved.
I live in an apartment and the walls are not soundproof and the windows are usually open and people here don’t see any need to restrain their voices so I guess I would have heard something after a year and a half if physical DV was taking place in my block. I’ve heard nothing.
China is a big place and different places no doubt have different character. There are some terrible things going on. Kidnapping and selling of women happens in some provinces where a shortage of women, arising from selective abortion, makes this a profitable business. (Baby stealing and selling is also common in some parts.) I even heard that some of these women are hamstrung by their husbands to prevent them from running away – an inconceivable act of violence from my perspective. Farmers wanting an heir are the chief buyers.
I have a post here about a Chinese woman who sought her fortune in Japan and had a scary experience for several months just escaping being exploited in the sex ‘industry’.
I welcome comment, opinions, your feelings about what I have written, and from anyone who has knowledge of research figures or any other concrete information about violence towards women in China.