My earliest memory? Well, in the womb. I suppose you don’t believe me so I will explain why it is that I say that. When I was a child I had dreams that made me feel afraid. There was no content in the dreams I was in a grey void and felt afraid. It wasn’t an even grey but a grey that was composed of millions of tiny dots switching on and off, sort of like sparkling but it was all dull. It felt creepy. I had the dream quite a few times in my childhood and always felt awful. Much later in life I was going through emotional upheavals and became inwardly focussed to try to sort things out. One evening I was in a sort of trance state, not asleep, and I came to be reliving my childhood bad dream. However, it was clearer and I felt the sensation of squeezing, of being squeezed. When I came out of trance I interpreted this as a memory of my birth. I experienced fear at my birth.
Does anyone else here have memories or feelings that they believe are birth memories? If so, please share them with us. I am wondering how my birth experience affected me. Did it predispose me to fear change? That seems unlikely as I am drawn to change to the extent that I don’t find it easy to settle in one place for more than a few years. I must think more about that.